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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 3, 2007 23:21:27 GMT -5
Spottedshadow glared down at the rabbit she was eating. It wasn't fair, at least it didn't seem that way to her. She didn't want to have kits, as a matter of fact just the idea of it made her shiver, she was scared, but there was nothing she could do now. She was going to have kits soon and there was no stopping their coming.
Looking up from her rabbit she felt the sting of tears in her eyes and immediately looked back down at her rabbit. She had hardly touched the rabbit, she wasn't hungry. She only ate because she knew she had to, for her kits. She might be scared about having them, but she wanted them to be healthy, it wouldn't be fair to them if she didn't eat properly while pregnat and then they were born ill.
If there was one thing that Spottedshadow hated it was being treated unfair, and because of that she tried to be fair to everyone. But as tears were stinging at her bright emerald eyes and pain swirled in them she couldn't help but wish that she could be completely unfair to the kits..And have them just disappear. Her painful memories flooded back to her like waves in a river..
She had been younger then, she had gotten mad at her mother and decided to hunt by herself..Then a twoleg kit squealed at her so she ran, and ran right into the bigger twoleg, who captured her and forced her to mate with their big Siamese cat. They couldn't tame her so they thought they could keep one of her kits that looked like her. She had been used and hurt..And now she just wanted to know: Why her?
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 3, 2007 23:35:50 GMT -5
Frightstar padded forward and saw one of his clan's queens, Spottedshadow looking quite upset. Wrestling with his inner thoughts, measuring up what he could do, he sighed silently and made his way over to the pretty she-cat. "Spottedshadow," he meowed gruffly, sitting down beside her. "How are you?" Not wanting to scare her off by directly asking her why she looked so sad, he decided on a more subtle approach.
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 3, 2007 23:53:10 GMT -5
Without meaning to Spottedshadow jumped when Frightstar sat down next to her, she hadn't been expecting the clan leader to come and talk to her, but she was awefully lonely. She knew beggers couldn't be choosers..So after taking another bite of her rabbit she mewed softly, her voice sweet,"I'm fine.."
After a heartbeat or two of silence she added,"And you?" Her emerald eyes glittered in the sun that bathed the camp, but her eyes, although they were a bright color seemed dark and dreary.
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Post by ~*Rainstorm*~ on Jul 4, 2007 9:22:57 GMT -5
Rainstorm padded up to Spottedshadow, prey hanging limp in her jaw. She dropped the prey at the queen's feet. "Here. Eat. I know you're having a tough time, but do it for the kits. I've had kits, totally out of the blue. They all died at birth...please eat for the sake of your kits." Her eyes welled up with tears, and she was lost in sad, sad, memories. She pushed the vole towards Spottedshadow, her eyes pleading; for the sake of the kits. A deputy should not act this unstable and emotional, she realized, but as hard as she tried, the memory clung to her like a burr in her coat.
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 4, 2007 12:04:29 GMT -5
Frightstar gave Rainstorm a warm look. "I'll make sure she eats it, Rainstorm," he rumbled. "Go ahead," he nodded for her to go; he knew she needed time.
Turning to Spottedshadow, he nosed the vole closer to her. "As long as you eat something, I won't make you eat everything." He sat up straight and looked forward. "I'm doing fine. I suspect you're lying, though." He continued staring forward, allowing her the privacy to eat.
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 4, 2007 13:32:15 GMT -5
Spottedshadow looked up at Rainstorm caringly and mewed,"Are you okay?" The she-cat didn't look okay, she looked devastated and it hurt Spottedshadow to see her clan deputy hurt so..Now that she was deputy she technically couldn't have kits, unless she wanted to step down as deputy while she had them, and probably get in trouble with Frightstar..
Taking a bite of the vole and swallowing it quickly, as if she couldn't stand the taste of the food in her mouth she mewed quietly to Frightstar,"I might be lying..but it doesn't matter..." And with that she stopped eating and let her head rest on her front paws.
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 5, 2007 11:30:04 GMT -5
Firghtstar snorted. "Doesn't matter?" He lashed his tail. "Why do you think that it doesn't matter? You are an admired cat of CloudClan, Spottedshadow, and many cats care for you." He looked at her. "Me being one of them." He tensed his body up and poked the vole with a paw. "Now eat. Those kits will be your whole world when they're born." Thinking of his deputy, he sighed. "Rainstorm knows all about that." OOC: Hope that wasn't too girl-y for such a manly cat.  §hOCKS |
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 5, 2007 13:22:03 GMT -5
OOC: It was fine lol
"I hope they're my world.." mewed Spottedshadow to herself, she really wasn't sure if she could love these kits when she was afraid to have them, and especially since she didn't want to have kits in the firt place. She had never thought that she would have kits, she wanted to be a warrior forever, never have to worry about being a queen. But here she was, about to kit, within the moon and there was nothing she could do but listen to her clan leader and deputy and hope that she really could love these kits.
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 5, 2007 13:31:18 GMT -5
Frightstar laid down next to her. "They will be." He always loved kits, so innocent and small and squishy. "You'll never love fully until you've had kits." It was true; there was never a fiercer love then a mother's bond with her kits. "Are you worried about kitting? Or is it just that you don't want them?" He figured if he was here talking to her, he might as well ask what was wrong.
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 5, 2007 14:06:42 GMT -5
Sighing sadly Spottedshadow mewed,"You know I wasn't born into Lightningclan, I just joined about a moon ago." she hated not being clan born, but she had trained to be a warrior in Airclan for awhile, untill her mother made her be a rouge again. If she had stayed in Airclan she might not be pregnat with these kits right now..
Shaking her head, bringing herself back to reality she looked up at the sky, wishing it were later in the day and she could see the beautiful stars of Silverpelt glittering down on her. They were her largest comfort lately and she longed to see them.
"Well, I was born as a rouge." she began, Frightstar had been kind enough to let her join the clan without asking about her past, and he had a right to know. Her mother always had said there was no time like the present...Not that she liked her mother or anything, but it was a good quote.
"When I was 6 moons old I went to Airclan and asked to join their clan. Their former leader Quietstar, who was then Quietstorm mentored me for awhile. As soon as I got my warrior name my mother wanted me to be a rouge again. She pulled me out of the clan and said that if I didn't become a rouge agains he'd have all her friends attack the camp." Spottedshadow looked down from the sky sadly and mewed," I didn't want Airclan to be hurt so I left the clan."
Tears welled up in the young she-cat's eyes as she went on sadly. "Then a coupe of twolegs were walking though the territory we were in at the time, I don't remember which one. Then captured me and tried to make me into their own personal kittypet. But I wouldn't calm down, there was no way I was going to be a kittypet! So, because they wanted a cat that looked like me...They..." her voice trailed off and she shuttered. After a few heartbeats she continuted though,"They forced me to mate with their Siamese tom and they thought after I had the kits they'd let me go and then keep the kits for themselves..."
She looked into Frightstar's eyes and mewed softly,"I never wanted to have kits, I wanted to be a warrior in Airclan, but they said I could never return if I left. So here I am..In Cloudclan, about to have kits that I don't want."
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Post by ~*Rainstorm*~ on Jul 5, 2007 14:40:19 GMT -5
Rainstorm's eyes widened with grief for the young she-cat. She knew not any words of comfort, it was all so devastating. Then, suddenly, she spoke, "You can't say that. I don't you don't want the kits now, but once they're born you'll think otherwise...trust me, I know all about that...If you're not looking forward to having them, the least you can do is try to want them after you have had them. No use giving them away. I don't, personally, know what that's like, but it must hurt..."
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 5, 2007 14:46:04 GMT -5
Half whimpering, half sighing Spottedshadow mewed,"I want to love them..I'm just afraid I won't be able to."
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 5, 2007 22:25:47 GMT -5
Frightstar turned his head to look at her and laid his head down on his paws. "You'll find love, Spottedshadow. I'm sure it won't be too hard." He gave a half-hearted laugh. "I love kits, and I'm sure you wouldn't expect that coming from me."
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 5, 2007 22:57:47 GMT -5
Spottedshadow lifted her head, her eyes glittering with newly found ammusement,"No I wasn't expecting that." she admitted.
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 5, 2007 23:07:42 GMT -5
Frightstar rolled his eyes. "Well, I do," he said. "They make the clan glow and can lift the spirits of a fox." He sunk his claws into the earth. "If someone like myself can love kits, then you can, Spottedshadow," he assured, completely serious.
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 5, 2007 23:42:20 GMT -5
Spottedshadow purred after hearing her leader's words. If he was so confident that she'd love the kits then there was no doubt in her mind that she could prove him wrong. She would love her kits.
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 6, 2007 8:34:03 GMT -5
Frightstar huffed as he hauled himself to his paws. "Well, I hate to leave you, but I've got a clan to boss around," he mewed. "If you need anything, Rainstorm and I are here." He nodded to her and walked away. "And make sure to eat!" he called over his shoulder, even throwing a laugh back to her. OOC: Ummm... We could skip to another time when Spottedshadow is feeling apprehensive about her kits. Or we can do something completely different. It's up to you!  §hOCKS |
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 6, 2007 13:43:47 GMT -5
OOC: Or I could go ahead and make the thread where she's having her kits...
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Post by Frighteh on Jul 6, 2007 18:08:03 GMT -5
...*blinks*
That works too! Go ahead! From there we can plan on what'll happen between the two and see how we'll get them hooked up.
§hOCKS
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Post by *~Quietstar~* on Jul 6, 2007 23:49:29 GMT -5
OOC: Okay..*goes off to make thread in the nursery*
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